Only once in the past had I been this emotionally involved with someone else, and I never had difficulty sharing Rinna with Taliesen. In many ways, in fact, sharing made it better – there was nothing more exquisite than watching your lover being driven completely senseless with pleasure.But somehow, despite that, this wasn't working out the way I'd imagined. My Warden was lying on our bed, tongue tangling with Isabela's while she carded her fingers through his hair. Both of them were half-undressed, offering tantalising glimpses of soft, bronze skin pressing up against the hard, pale lines of my lover, and I could barely restrain myself from walking out of the room.I forced myself to be still, furiously trying to convince myself that Aedan didn't care for me less because he received pleasure from someone else, but for the first time since I was a young Crow in training, I couldn't help feeling ... insecure.Aedan had managed to finish undressing the both of them while I was. After a few minutes she drove from the parking lot. I watched her tail lights disappear as she drove down the deserted street. I just sat there for a few minutes. I was too worked up to go back home so I went to a Denny’s to think over several cups of coffee. I just had a wonderful time with a gorgeous young lady, so why couldn’t I just revel in my nirvana and be happy…because after twelve years of loving someone, you don’t just turn it off like a switch. For the second time tonight I felt the pangs of guilt. I thought about what Diane said, how guilty she felt after sleeping with someone. I wondered if she felt more or less guilty than I feel right now. This isn’t fair, I thought. I’m the injured party here, I shouldn’t feel guilty at all. I need to get on with my life. How am I going to do that if I feel guilty every time I enjoy someone’s company. Again, I pushed the guilt to the side and tried to concentrate on the feeling of elation that I felt with Cathy’s mouth engulfing.
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